Homelessness charity urges parents to consider fear and confusion may be the cause of anger and other behavioural differences
Homelessness charity, Llamau, are urging parents and guardians of children and young people to consider the fact that any anger, frustration or other behavioural differences they’re seeing, could be the result of fear and confusion caused by such drastic changes to our way of living.
With routines being sorely disrupted, social interactions being dramatically reduced and independence being challenged, it’s understandable that children and young people will be feeling the effects of lockdown and isolation.
It’s important to be aware that your children are likely tuning into as much news around the Coronavirus as you are. They could be hearing the latest updates on the TV, through message groups with their friends, social media or through listening into household conversations.
Children and young people have not yet fully developed the ability to adequately deal with their feelings and emotions, so at this time they may be displaying behaviours outside of their ‘norm’. These behaviours could range from anger and frustration to periods of silence or ignorance and at times defiance when being asked to do something that wouldn’t normally cause a problem.
Llamau’s Family Mediation Worker, Katy Brophy explains parents and guardians should keep in mind that these behavioural changes could just be a symptom of to this ever-changing situation and to remain as calm as possible, showing your children you understand and that you’re there to support them.
“It’s really important as parents and guardians to keep in mind that these behavioural differences are a very normal reaction to this ever-changing situation and to remain as calm as possible in order to show them that you understand, and that you’re there to support them.
“Inevitably tensions will rise between families at this time but there are some effective ways to help reduce tension and shift focus back to the positives of spending quality time together as a family.”
Ensuring a stable routine is amongst some of the ways Katy recommends helping you and your child/children through this new temporary way of life.
“Stick to your normal as best you can. Wake, eat and sleep around your normal times if possible. Make sure you build the fun stuff into your routine and try to build new things in. Figure out what you want to achieve as a family through this time, watch new films, cook and get creative together.
“When you’re faced with big emotions in yourself or from others, acknowledge and allow these feelings to surface. Ask yourself or others ‘what do you need?’ This allows you to stop and explore rather than try to push away or defend, which can often create more turmoil than it solves.
“If the emotions are so big and your buttons are being pressed so they are unmanageable in that moment, walk away, distract and soothe with things that occupy your senses like a hot drink, music, movement, dance, exercise. If you’re able to go out for your one walk and notice your surroundings, tune into the peace and quiet until the storm passes, which it will.”
Llamau also recognises that tensions between young people and their families may well increase while everyone is having to spend more time at home, and there may well be families who need some professional support to prevent their relationships from getting worse.
Family breakdown is the number one cause of youth homelessness in the UK, and it’s possible that this period of self-isolation and social distancing could cause an increase in youth homelessness if families aren’t supported to maintain positive relationships at home. Llamau’s Family Mediation service works with families, offering a confidential, impartial and safe space to explore and improve their relationships and is very successful at enabling young people to stay at home and enabling families to rebuild their relationships. The service is still operating at this time and is still delivering family mediation sessions remotely.
If you would like support from Llamau’s Family Mediation service, please visit https://www.llamau.org.uk/Pages/FAQs/Category/coronavirus-how-to-get-support-if-you-need-it for details on how to contact our Family Mediation services in your area or contact [email protected]
