Dan Stanley, the award-winning founder of the BetterMen organisation has warned that men are being marginalised in large businesses and that quiet quitting will become a real problem if something isn’t done to address the issue.
Ahead of International Men’s Day 2022, which takes place on Saturday November 19, Dan offered his warning following a number of recent conversations.
“I was talking to an HR director recently and I asked them, ‘What are you doing for your men?’ There was silence. And in that moment of discomfort, the realisation was that nothing was being done. With so much focus being given to diversity and inclusion, and rightfully so, giving everyone a voice, the realisation was that, potentially as a gender, men are being left behind.”
There is the sense that rather than promoting greater equality for all, the modern workplace is leaving men behind and failing to address mental health issues that could have serious repercussions for both businesses and their staff.
“Many men are feeling marginalised or that their life and personal challenges are less equal to other groups,” Dan added. “In corporates, there’s still a silent stigma attached to poor mental health; it leads many men to hide how they feel for fear of being deemed weak or not up to the job and potentially overlooked for promotion.
“I was at a charity function recently, chatting with a bunch of guys from a large multinational consultancy about my book. One started whispering about the challenges of his profession and the remuneration being essentially ‘a pound of flesh’. I said, have you noticed you’re whispering, he laughed it off but for me it represents an awareness of how many men feel, how they have to hide their opinions and feelings.
“Quiet quitting is going to become a significant challenge for businesses, as more and more men recognise that professional success can come at a cost – they can end up earning a living, without actually living.”
A survey published early in 2022, shows that quiet quitting (or a modern take on the phrase working to rule) is on the rise with around a third of employees unhappy in their professional lives.
Dan offers the following advice for large companies who are serious about ensuring all of their employees are equally valued, including men:
- Like with other groups, ensure there is someone on the D&I committee that is representing men.
- Instead of the standard corporate well-being training, think about who your men would/could connect and resonate with.
- Invite men to attend discussions and talk groups – safe spaces, facilitated by outside agencies where they can decompress and share non-judgmentally.
- Proactively, investing financial resources in the leadership and performance of men will improve their performance, lives and the bottom line.
Dan works to support professional men who want more out of life. He is the author of bestselling, Rethinking Masculinity – a modern man’s guide to succeeding in life, which was written for men who have ‘experienced a setback, find themselves stagnant or are silently enduring the second half of their life. It’s a guide for any man who is questioning ‘is this it?’ or fears his best years are behind him’.
There is a perception that men are still expected to prove their ‘worth’ through their work, to ignore their feelings and intuition. This can lead to workaholism, loneliness and poor mental health.
“There’s no such thing as work/life separation. If someone is withdrawn or irritable, visibly carrying stress or behaving out of character, there’s a window of opportunity to support them. If that window is missed and the person is left to wander, unaided into their challenges, personal or professional, inevitably this will have negative consequences in their areas of business or with the teams they lead.”
